Most people stay trapped in the status quo because they don’t know how to live the life they want. Which is why you need to visualize your ideal day, in order to become who you want to be and know what you want your life to look like.
Unfortunately the status quo is the default setting for most of us. And we’re usually entrenched in it because of our circle of influence (the family members, friends, colleagues and peers we choose to surround ourselves with). Not to mention our life experiences and plain old human nature.
Without training, our subconscious mind will opt for the path of least resistance and allow the negative aspects of life to inform the way we think and act. Which is why the safe status quo is the most comfortable setting for most people, even if that means they aren’t living a life of purpose and fulfillment. Most of us aren’t even aware that we’re settling for less with the status quo, at least not on a conscious level.
The good news is that you can rewire your subconscious with a meta-story
By training our subconscious mind to associate only positive things with our goals, ambitions and desires, we stand a much better chance of attaining them. In this video, high-performance coach and personal development trainer Brendon Burchard reveals how (and why) it’s crucial for you to design a perfect day. This is how to think about an ideal day and life, and how to live it each day.
Brendan’s video certainly helped me to see it as a lifestyle I was striving to achieve and a day to repeat throughout the year, rather than literally a 24-hour period.
The Ideal Day exercise (which I recommend for anybody who’s feeling unfulfilled and unhappy with their life), is a fantastic meta story example. Why? Because it allows you to visualize your ideal day, in order to become who you want to be and know what you want your life to look like. It also helps you to be your authentic self, the you who is truly happy and fulfilled. It isn’t reality yet, but the act of creating the meta story in your mind and writing it down helps you to focus on creating that ideal day (and life).
In order to create your own Ideal Day or meta story, you should first ask yourself these questions:
- How does my day start? Who is with me?
- How much time do I spend working? What do I do for leisure?
- How does it look? Use your senses to see, feel, taste, touch, hear
- What’s important to me and where am I looking to get to?
- Why is it I want these things and is it worth the work?
Defining your meta-story changes your habitual thought patterns and muscle memory. And this will give you the strength to overcome all obstacles until your life reflects your heart’s joy. In other words, you’re living your best life.
The meta story is also the basis of How to Get Lots of Money for Anything Fast, by Stuart Lichtman and Joe Vitale. Admittedly, it wouldn’t win the Booker Prize for title of the year, but the content is compelling. A meta story is a way of training your subconscious mind to drive you towards success – in whatever area you want it to.
This is a very simplified explanation of what is actually a sophisticated scientific system of brain training called Cybernetic Transposition. Stuart Lichtman and Joe Vitale define this as a method which “can bring you all the love, money, health, success, or anything else you can name”.
How to Get Lots of Money for Anything Fast isn’t actually available to purchase anywhere except on their website, but you can download a free copy here.
What would your Ideal Day look like? Here’s mine:
My iDEAL DAY
It’s Thursday 29th June 2023. I awaken at 6.30am, sunlight streaming through the window. I do some stretches and breathing exercises then go downstairs and make a cup of tea. I bask in the warmth of the early morning sun and take a moment to be grateful and visualize my goals for the day.
I hear the tippy tap of paws on the kitchen flagstones and Darakht, our rescue dog from Afghanistan, appears in the doorway. I can also hear our Shetland pony neighing in greeting as he’s seen that we’re up, so I go and say hello and give him a good scratch behind his ears. Next I go and feed our chickens – they laid four eggs this morning. Back at the house, I make a cup of coffee for Dave and go upstairs to see that he’s awake and also enjoying the sun’s rays. We have a kiss and a cuddle, then open up the skylight to welcome in the new day.
Dave takes the dogs out before it gets too hot, while I take a shower in my wet room. Back in June 2021, I was run ragged trying to clean and maintain our Airbnb between the back to back bookings we had as a result of everybody staycationing post-lockdown. Whilst it was a vital source of income when my online business was in its early stages, passive income it was not. I’m grateful that I know how to generate that with ease and get to show other people how they can set themselves free with multiple income streams. Needless to say, I thank my lucky stars that we not only have the Godsend of a bathroom each, but we can also now afford to have them cleaned by somebody else.
Like every summer’s day (and most spring and autumn days to be honest), I choose a bikini, t-shirt and shorts. I still relish not having to think about what I’m going to wear most days and the freedom of little clothing. Unlike back in the UK.
I go and say hello to Irene and tell her about our plans for the day while I clean her windows. Then it’s time to feed our pony, pygmy goats, miniature Spanish donkey and the alpacas. They’re getting quite woolly now. Soon it will be time to shear them and sell the wool to a lady in the village. Our menagerie of animals makes me feel so happy and content.
I wander down to my writing hut in the garden, Darakht the Afghani Street dog trotting along beside me. Six years after we adopted him, he’s still my shadow and I love it. Whilst he faces stiff competition from Pablo, our first Spanish rescue, he’ll always be a Mummy’s boy. Nowadays he prefers hanging out in the garden to accompanying our other dogs on a walk. And curling up in his bed in the corner of my writing hut.
My favourite time to write is early in the mornings, ideally before anybody else is up. For me, writing is a compulsion. It helps me order my thoughts and make sense of the world. Without it I’m never my true or best self. For the past two years, since I did the Incubate program and also created my Best Life Blueprint, I’ve also prioritised self-care and growth. I religiously follow the advice of author Julia Cameron in The Artist’s Way and write my morning pages every day. There doesn’t have to be a purpose or outcome for the writing, it’s the process that matters.
And now I have the writing space I’ve always wanted. Not just a room in the house, but a dedicated, sacrosanct space that everybody knows they enter on pain of death. Because I find the anticipation of being interrupted very difficult. I’m an introvert (an INTJ if you’re familiar with the Myers Briggs personality types), which means that a lot of things are over stimulating and drain my energy. I’m also an empath and absorb other people’s emotions and feelings whether I want to or not. So alone time is so important for my well being.
Being so easily distracted means it takes me a long time to get back into flow. Not so long ago, I would have constantly felt the need to apologise for this, but the personal growth I’ve undergone in the past few years has taught me how to value myself a lot more.
It’s a far cry from back in June 2021 when we lived in a tiny home where space was at a premium. I worked from the dining table next to the wall-mounted TV in the middle of an open-plan kitchen/lounge/diner. Hence why I now value this space so much and feel so grateful that I have it.
While I fire up my Mac, I pinch myself at the view of the terraced vineyards and hills beyond descending to the ocean. I make notes for tomorrow’s Zoom call with my editor to discuss the first draft of my novel. Then we head back up to the house to fix breakfast for the dogs.
Now that all the systems and automation are in place for our online businesses, we’re in the fortunate position of being able to outsource everything else and just focus on the bits we’re good at, the fun stuff. And for me, that means getting to spend my time on our off-grid land in Spain with my husband and our animals.
The eggs I collected are the perfect size for poaching. While the water heats up, I slice some sourdough to lightly toast on the griddle, select an avocado from the fruit bowl, and pluck a lime from one of our trees. I slice into the avocado’s perfectly ripe flesh, mash one half and cut the other into chunks for a bit of texture. I add chilli flakes, sea salt, coriander and mint leaves from the herb garden by the back door, half of the lime juice and spread it on the toast. As the eggs start to poach, I have just enough time to make another cup of coffee for Dave before they arrive back from their morning walk.
I feed the dogs and sprinkle the eggs with some of the chilli flakes and Worcestershire sauce. Then I make myself tea from the leaves we brought back from a recent trip to Sri Lanka, which have been steeping nicely in my favourite teapot. I haven’t bought tea bags for years as the majority of them still contain plastic and I’m very passionate about living as sustainable a life as possible. We sit down together at the kitchen table to eat our breakfast and talk about plans for the day.
First up is a trip to the local Mercadillo to find some furniture for my latest upcycling project, although I don’t need an excuse to bimble around those places. My parents are coming over in a few weeks to look after the place while we’re away. I’ll Zoom Mum later to get her input on the rusty enamel bath I’ve seen. It’ll be perfect for the outdoor bathroom Dave’s working on which has a killer view of the hills. Back at home, we work on some more prep for our trip to the Arctic Circle in Irene the campervan.
It’s early evening by the time we’ve finished. We decide to go for a ride on the electric bikes with Darakht in the cycle carrier, to get him used to it before we go on our trip. We wind up at the lake at the bottom of our land and have a quick dip in the water while we cool down and enjoy the sunset, before heading home to get ready for dinner. Tonight we’re going to a restaurant in the hills which specializes in local, Tapas dishes and comfy sofas to lounge in which is more our thing than stuff formal restaurants. Plus they make a mean Singapore Sling.
We have an agreement to leave our phones at home when we’re out for dinner. We talk about how much fun it just was to have some of our closest friends over from the UK and we must go back again soon. It’s my birthday in August and I’m planning to relive the rally driving experience I did for my 40th back in 2016. It was at the Forest Experience Rally School which Colin McRae drove around and which has been owned by various Rally Champions over the past 20 years. Red Bull and F3 teams have also used it for training and it’s a regular venue for Top Gear, so a pretty awesome place.
Since 2016, the track has undergone an extensive rebuild and I’m itching to try it out and get back in the driver’s seat. I love to drive fast and it’s not often my car really gets to stretch his tyres these days. The Rally School’s in mid-Wales and as our friends live all over the UK, we reckon we can crowbar in a few visits while we’re over, if we take the campervan.
We end the meal with a nightcap and a toast to Irene. We lost my Aunt in 2020 at the age of 62 and I frequently remind myself of the legacy of her mindset. Which was always to seize the day, live it on her terms and fuck what other people think.
When we get back from the restaurant, Dave has a missed call from his brother. While he rings him back, I check my phone and see we’ve had a few more sales and email signups to our video series. It reminds me to check in with some of the businesswomen in their 40s and 50s that I’m helping to overcome the self-limiting beliefs that are keeping them stuck. I send each of them a quick check-in email to see how they’re doing, ahead of their regular Zoom coaching calls next month.
There’s also been some activity on my online community Facebook page. When it comes to social media, I have quite strong views about it being so much about other people’s online boasts, self-editing online or negative news stories. And not buying into this anymore is one of the ways in which I control my environment, which is integral to my mental wellbeing. But the community social media groups are my one exception.
I take the time to respond to a couple of posts from new members with words of encouragement and support, because I know how valuable this was at the start of my journey to online entrepreneurship. I am once again reminded of how true success really does come from a place of collaboration and sharing.
Satisfied that I’ve achieved the most important things I wanted to today, I watch Dave prepare the fire pit and light some candles. We sit around it with a glass of red wine and our dogs, listening to the cicadas and other nighttime creatures sharing our beautiful home…